A young and hesitant hand reaches for the doorknob, pauses, and reluctantly follows through with its original intent. The door creaks slowly open to a dim-lit room with the familiar noise ringing through hollow halls. The lighting in the home changes abruptly many times as the television scenes shift back and forth between darkness and obnoxious bright. The shadows it creates are the only life that seems to be found inside the walls of this home. Slow steps take the youth to a doorway; the doorway—the only place of escape; escape from nothingness and emptiness; a room of vain attempts to find meaning and life beyond the shadows. The heavy backpack slides down to the floor with a thump like a burden dropping off weary shoulders. Headphones in, lights only partially on, and a distant gaze once again—a daily tradition, the routine of the youth, that perhaps for a moment hope can be found in the mystery of imagination.
But is imagination a true source of hope, or of false darkness? Joyce Carol Oates’ short story, “Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been”, exemplifies the role of an absent parent and dangerous imagination in a youth’s journey toward death. It speaks to misplaced care within a family and to direction lost in a parent’s deadly vacuum of silence and neglect. This story caught my attention because of the implications behind the text. “…the rest of the time Connie spent around the house—getting in her mother’s way and thinking, dreaming, about the boys she had met…Connie’s mother kept dragging her back to the daylight by finding things for her to do…” (Oates). Oates uses daydreaming frequently in the story to show how youth seek comfort in falsities when there is none to be found from their parents. The author implies that behind the seemingly blissful dreams there is emptiness and deception. Every imaginary picture in her story is compared to reality and found to be in complete contrast. The beauty Connie sees when she is falsely loved in the alley way with a strange boy; the romantic songs that speak of great love—love which could not possibly be found in situations such as hers—all speak to the deception that is ruling her life. It is falseness, and there is no one present to guide her to the truth, which ultimately leads to destruction.
In my opinion, daydreams are, for the most part, a source of hope—images to which I can look for encouragement when I cannot see past the wall of rain in front of me. That is, visions and images of a hopeful future, reminding me that just beyond the rain there is sunshine. This type of imagination is necessary and beneficial to a successful and fulfilling life. However, it is difficult to have this kind of hopeful imagination without it being fostered and protected by caring outward eyes. All too often, as in Connie’s situation, daydreaming can become imprisoning if it is not guided. It can grab hold of the deepest corners of the heart and force one to revisit past mistakes, to dwell on unfulfilled dreams, and to live out constant disappointment. To the one who does not have a source of inspiration and gentle direction in their life—a guiding light and a voice of reason; a voice to shake one out of darkness, and say to a falling heart, “No! You are loved!”—imagination can be a dangerous tool.
September 7, 2017
Works Cited:
Oates, Joyce Carol. “Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been”. 1970.